The Dress Drama

As I explained in the earlier post, the formal dances in Macon, GA in the 60's were many. With that came the always important part of getting "THE" dress. There was a place in Macon called Starnes Formalwear. Here's how it worked. We would go to Starnes and a nice lady with a clipboard would sit down with you and start asking questions. What event were you attending? Did you have a "special" role at this event? (Were you an officer of the sorority?) Did you have a special color in mind?



After answering all the questions, you were escorted into the dressing room which was much like you would see in a bridal shop today. You would put on the appropriate undergarments, they would bring you the hoop and you would step into it and secure it at the waist with the button. Then she would start bringing out dresses in the color of your choice until you made a decision that this was the "perfect" one. Part of the agreement was that you were guaranteed that no one else would show up in the same gown at the event that you were going to. If the dress needed a little altering, it was done and you picked the dress up the day before the dance and returned it the day after. This was done all for the whopping price of $15.00. Now, by today's standards, that doesn't seem like much, but in the early 60's, it was quite a large sum. You could feed a family of four for $15.00 per week. This did not include shoes, gloves, or wrap if it was a winter event. (By the way, stepping outside in one of those hooped gowns during the winter was just like stepping outside in a swimsuit.)



I had gone through all the budget money one year. Mother had a good friend that had a daughter that was about 3 years older than I was and during a conversation with Mother, she offered me one of her daughter's dresses that she knew she would never wear again. We took the dress and, of course, it needed altering. We took it to a seamstress that promised she could do the job. I was happy! It was a beautiful red chiffon dress. My date asked what color I would be wearing so that he could buy the proper color corsage. I thought everything was settled. We went to pick up the dress and brought it home for me to try on and to my dismay and horror, the dress had been butchered. I can't even think of another way to describe it. It was BUTCHERED!


What was I going to do? I was lamenting my tale at lunch the next day when one of my friends, Jerri Ann Whidden, said, "I've got a red dress that you can borrow" Saved by a friend! I went by and picked up the dress and Jerri Ann and I were both small, so it fit just fine.

Here is the red dress. Notice the glass slippers. I still have them!

Here is the rest of the story:

About two months after Jerri Ann loaned me the dress, she was killed in a car wreck. Her date was trying to get her home by her curfew and he was speeding and lost control of the car and she died in the accident. From that moment on, my Daddy never insisted that I be home by a certain hour. I was given a reasonable time and a few minutes before or after was fine. If I found that I was going to be much later than the curfew, I just had to call. They were very trusting of me and I really didn't give them any reason not to be. But it was because of Jerri Ann and that tragedy that they were really loose on my arrival time. It broke my heart. She and I were just 16 and life was just beginning.

I have often thought of her and every time I come across this picture, I think of her and what a good friend she was.

Thought for the day per Marie: To have a good friend, be one.

Horn Blows and other social rituals

My invitation to join KMS

As you know, I went to an all girl's high school. We really had to be creative as we became dating age because there was no social contact between the boys and the girls. Back, long before I got there, someone decided that sororities and fraternities would be a good idea. This would help bring about a social life for everyone. As you made friends in Junior High, you would align yourself with friends so that when you reached Senior High, they would "rush" you and, hopefully, invite you to belong to their sorority.

Each sorority and fraternity had a big formal dance. They were equally set throughout the year so that what most people know as Prom season did not converge all at once. My sorority had a spring formal. The sorority that my sister belonged to had a winter formal, so literally there were one to two formals a month. That could really drain the budget!!

The horn blows. Each sorority had a specific horn blow. Try beeping your car horn in little staccato beeps. Some I remember were: Beep,Beep,Beep, - Beep,Beep,Beep- Beep Beep Beep. That signified one sorority. Then there was Beep,Beep, - Beep Beep, Beep Beep. I hope you get the idea. The purpose of the horn blow was so that if you were going through a neighborhood and passing one of your friends houses, you could do the horn blow and she would know exactly who was passing.

Artist rendering of The Pig 'n Whistle

This was the hang out. It was where everyone converged after a date or instead of a date. If you were hanging out with girl friends, you would go to the Pig. It was THE meeting spot. It was there that you could see who was dating whom. (Side note. My Daddy worked there with Aunt Willie Mae's husband, Glenn and Glenn introduced Daddy to my Mother. It was when he first arrived in Macon and they were working there as short order cooks.) After socializing for hours and having the Pig Special, you would leave and, of course, as you were driving out of the parking lot, you would do your sorority horn blow. (See how important these horn blows were.)

Here I am at one of the formals. This one was called The Peppermint Twist. Have you ever seen a bigger dress? I am only five feet tall, so I was all dress and, of course, the obligatory french twist hair do. I think this was about 1962.

This was at the Military Ball in March of 1964. The young man in the photo was really just a friend. His name is Bill Fields. I had so exhausted the formal budget for the year that my friend, Sharon Orwan made my dress. (We have lost Sharon to breast cancer in 2005.) She was an amazing seamstress to be a senior in high school, but I thought it looked really nice. As you can see, the style had become a little straighter and no longer were the big hooped ball gowns fashionable.









This was at one of the big dances and the young man is Lee Tanksley. Lee was really my High School Sweetheart. We went to several big dances together and dated until my junior year. He was quite accomplished. He was the band Drum Major and, also, Captain of the Golden Boots precision drill team at the boys high school.


Lee went to the University of Georgia and participated in ROTC there. So when he graduated from college, he was immediately commissioned into the Army as a Lieutenant. He served two tours of duty in Viet Nam. We stayed in touch most of our adult life. He married and had a son and lived in Jackson, Mississippi. In January, 1988, I got a phone call from his cousin Nancy and she said sadly that he had committed suicide. I had not talked with him in a while and all she was able to tell me was that he was depressed over many things. He was 42.


Every now and then, when I go through old pictures and I come across a picture of him that I saved, I am truly sad. He took me to my first big dance and he took me out on my 16th birthday. It just did not compute that he would end his life so young and so tragically. I think this was a life defining moment for me and made me realize just how important life is and how short it can be.

This is just a snippet of dating in the 60's. It was a wonderful time. It was a safe time. I'm sure I'll share more of the stories of my friends and growing up in upcoming posts.

Senior High

A.L. Miller Senior High School for Girls

est. 1931

Hail to the Class that offers more

Hail to the Class of '64

Miller Senior High was established in 1931 for the public education of girls in grades 10-12. The boys attended Lanier Senior High and it was approximately 1 mile from the girls school. The schools were partnered in that Miller provided the cheerleaders for the sports teams and the Homecoming Queen. Other than that there was very little inner action between the two schools. Lanier had a full Jr. ROTC program and if a young man was caught on our campus, he would be punished through the military program at his school. And when I say it was an all girl school, it was. The entire faculty and the Principal were all female. I did not have a male teacher until I went to college.

The curriculum at the school was amazing. I took college prep classes that were very advanced for the times. I took three years of Latin and two years of French. The math was very advanced for the times. We had very strong History and Social Studies departments as well. I did not fully understand how good my education was until my Freshman year of college. My roommates would be up studying until all hours and I would go to bed at a decent hour. I made Dean's List my Freshman year all because of the strong education that I received at Miller.

At the University of Georgia I worked in the Admissions Office. When high school applications came in they were given a plus or minus score based on the high school that the applicant attended. The highest was a plus five and Miller graduates received a plus five. There were only five schools in the State of Georgia that received a plus five and Miller was one of them.

Carol Marie Horne

Senior Year

1964

I was the second oldest girl in my class of about 300. The cut off for the Board of Education was December 1st and my birthday was December 8th, so when I started first grade, I turned seven on December 8th. It did not register that I was the second oldest in my class until my Sophomore year when we were all approaching the magical 16th birthday. One of my friends was 16 on December 1st and I turned 16 exactly one week later. It was quite special to be one of the first to get my license. But with getting that license came responsibilities.

I turned 16 on a Friday. My High School Sweetheart took me out to dinner like a grown-up and it was my first date. (I was not allowed to date until I was 16.) On Saturday morning, my Daddy got me up bright and early and said he had a few errands for me to run. I was sent to the grocery wholesale house to purchase groceries for the store and then off to the meat packing plant to order all the meat for the store. And I thought I'd just be cruising with my girlfriends to all the hot spots!! (By the way, one of my gifts was my own key to the family car. A very large Buick!)

The President of the United States and the First Lady

John F. Kennedy and Jacqueline Kennedy

Taken on that fateful day in November, 1963

There are many events that will occur in your life that you will remember where you were and what you were doing when you heard the news. One of those days was the assassination of President Kennedy in Dallas, Texas. I was a senior in high school and had entered my sixth period class Economics. Mrs Brubaker's head was down and she looked distraught. As we all took our seats, she said that the President had been shot. You could hear the intake of breath. This was before schools were equipped with TV's and intercoms. Shortly after two o'clock, another teacher entered the classroom and whispered in her ear and she began to cry. Through her tears she told us that the President was dead.

For the next four days, the Nation mourned the loss. It was on all the TV stations (all three) with non-stop coverage. People would watch through the windows of stores where TV's had been placed and openly cry. It didn't matter what political party you were a member of, truly back then, the Nation came together when a new President was elected. The very thought that something like this could happen was beyond belief. The funeral, with all it's pomp and circumstance, was televised for all to see. Everyone was very saddened. How could this be?

Then through a strange turn of events, I was watching live when Jack Ruby shot Lee Harvey Oswald right in front of the world. I had this feeling of "did I just see what I think I saw?"

The 60's were very turbulent times!

Coming next: Dating in High School and other fun stuff!

Junior High

Miller Junior High School

Grades 8 and 9

Miss Clara Nell Hargrove, Principal

The interesting thing about Miss Hargrove is that she was Principal at the Junior High and then moved to the Senior High, so I only had two Principal's all the way through school.

Gym Class

I wanted everyone to see the gym suits. They were royal blue with your last name embroidered on the back. Either white or blue Keds with bobby socks was the uniform.

That is me with my back to the camera.

That is me on the right third from the point.

In the 9th grade, there were gym assistants that wore white gym suits. We assisted the gym teachers by umpiring or being a referee in basketball or soccer. We also marched. We were told that it gave us rhythm. To this day, I can square a corner. Gym assistants called the commands as the marching music played. We played volleyball, basketball, marched, field hockey, and softball. It was quite a well rounded curriculum. But here's the funny. Becoming a gym assistant was quite an honor. It was probably the highest honor that one could receive in Junior High, outside of being elected a class officer. The rules to be named a gym assistant were comprised of a point system along with the grades that you made in the 8th grade. Then at the end of the 8th grade school year, the new gym assistants were named.

I made straight A's my 8th grade year. I had many outside activities, so I was quite surprised to see my name on the list. I HATE gym. But, amazingly, that didn't matter! So, I got to wear the white suit and assist the teachers for my 9th grade year. I still have my referee's whistle on a green and white lanyard.

This is one of the organizations that I belonged to. Tri-Hi-Y
I am third up from the point on the left side.

Miss Adele Connor
9th Grade World History Teacher

I wanted to include this story about Miss Connor. She was tough!!! We started at the beginning of the year outlining the entire history book. By the end of the year it was probably a good 6 inches or more thick. Anyway, her classroom was out on the wing of the school that had the Principal's office, Library, Infirmary and her classroom.

The last day of school before Thanksgiving Holidays we were having our big test that ended the grading period. Miss Connor was out that day to travel to visit family, so the Principal, Miss Hargrove offered to administer the test for her and keep them in her office until her return. The test was the hardest test I think I have ever taken. It was five discussion questions and I still remember the first one. "Discuss the fall of the Roman Empire." Oh well, haven't books been written on that one subject? I did the best that I could, but felt a bad grade coming.

During the Thanksgiving Holidays, there was a fire at the school and that wing was destroyed, along with the tests. I DID NOT START THAT FIRE!!! But, I hate to admit it, I was secretly glad that it happened. When Miss Connor returned and learned the fate of the tests, she gave us a multiple choice test which I aced with no problems.

Junior High was a time of a lot of beginnings - group activities with boys and getting our Learner's Permits. As you can tell by the pictures, it was an all girl high school. At the time I hated it, but later appreciated the quality of the education that I received there.

Virgil Powers Grammar School

Virgil Powers Grammar School

This is the elementary school that I attended for grades 1 through 7. In Macon they were called grammar schools. Virgil Powers was State Railroad Commissioner, Public Works Commissioner of the City of Macon, and a member of the Bibb County Board of education. He died at the age of 75 in 1894 and was considered a leading citizen of the State of Georgia.

Me in the 2nd Grade

My 3rd grade class

The teacher is Sara Jane Bradley

Can you spot me?

Me in the 7th Grade

My 7th Grade Graduation
Miss Frances Oliver, Principal (on far left)
Teacher (on left) Miss Pauline Bronson and (on right) Mrs. Jean Thomas

I remember every teacher that I had in elementary school. I attended the same school with the same Principal for the entire time.

My teachers were:

1st Grade - Miss Ruth Elder

2nd Grade- Mrs. Anna Ruth Leaptrol

3rd Grade - Mrs. Sara Jane Bradley

4th Grade - Mrs. Jewel Culpepper

5th Grade - Mrs. Annie McDonald

6th Grade - Mrs Jackie Mann

7th Grade - Mrs. Jean Thomas

By the very fact that I can remember all their names should tell that they all left a great impression on me, each in their on way.

Every year we had a Halloween Festival that would be filled with all the usual fair. Then, in the Spring, we had a May Festival. We had a May Pole and one of the highlights of my schooling there was to be in the class that did the May Pole Dance. That might be something to look up if you don't know what it is. Every class would perform a folk dance native to a foreign country. It was quite fun and the big finish would be the crowning of the May King and Queen. I was in the court, but by the time I got to the 7th grade, the program was changed and I was Maid Marion to Robin Hood.

The 7th graders had the special experience of having a Prom. I know most of you do not even know how a prom really works, but ours was the traditional way. When the young ladies entered the room, in a long prom dress, of course, we were given a Dance Card. It was tied around your wrist. Then the young men had to come to you and ask to be put on your Dance Card. There would be general dancing and then an announcement would be made that it was time for Promenade number one. At that point, you would find the young man that had asked for the first dance and you would dance with him. Then you would put your arm through his and promenade around the school yard. You would come back in and there would be more general dancing and then the announcement would come for Promenade number two and you would find that young man. It was the first event that I remember feeling like a grown up.

There are many fond memories of Virgil Powers, indeed!

In 3rd grade photo, I'm on third row, 6th in and in Graduation photo, I am on 2nd row, second in.

Take me out to the ballgame......

Behind Home Plate
Entrance to Ball Park

This is the entrance to Luther Williams Ball Park in Macon, Georgia where I grew up. It is the second oldest minor league stadium in the country. It was built in 1929 and it is the home of the Macon Music, but today I will reminisce about the 1950's when it was home to the Macon Peaches.

During that time my Daddy had season tickets. Our seats were the best in the house, directly behind Home Plate. The seats were the old uncomfortable wooden kind that folded up and had no padding whatsoever. His initials, JHH, were stenciled on the back of the seats, so everyone knew who those seats belonged to. The first picture is directly behind Home Plate and the view that we had during the games. When a fast ball went over the plate, you could feel the breeze. That's how close we were.

Mother hated baseball, so Daddy would take me. Yes, from the time that I was about 3 years old until I left for college at age 18, I was at Luther Williams Baseball Park at every game with my Daddy. This was a different time and a bygone era where you did not have to worry about your child not being by your side at all times. I was literally let loose in that park when I got bored with the game. I would visit all the concession stands, visit the ticket booths, and visit with other fans.

I loved peanuts. Daddy would buy the bag, shell them, take off the red hull (I didn't like that) and feed them to me one at a time. Was I spoiled? Rotten probably just begins to get close! After the game was over, he would make a round of all the concessions and pay my tab. Such was life in a small town. We knew everybody there and they knew us. Something that I miss in today's world.


In addition to having one on one time with my Daddy and sharing a sport that we both loved (I learned to because of all the time we spent there), I got to see some pretty famous baseball players at the beginning of their careers. Pete Rose for one (1962) and Tony Perez (1963 and a Hall of Famer) and many others that went on to the "Show".

These are memories that will never fade. One regret that I have is that Daddy's health failed before I could get him to Atlanta to see a National League team.

Here I am just a few years ago sitting in the very seats that were ours.

So, it's one, two, three strikes you're out

at the ol' ballgame!

Who's the boss?

This is a picture of my Daddy when he was young and the way that I remember him. I was afraid of him or maybe I respected him and his position in the family. The other day my sister Kaye and I were discussing him and she asked "Why were we afraid of him?" I said I could recall the exact moment that we established the hierarchy in the family.

I was about 3 years old. About the age in this picture where I am looking ever so angelic as I played tea party with my doll. Behind the grocery store there was a city drainage ditch that was paved and used to catch all the water run off from the city streets. This ditch was sprayed with chemicals for mosquito control and if even a little rain came, it was a torrent of rushing water.

Daddy told me not to play in the ditch. There was usually a little stream of running water, so the temptation was just too much to bare. I thought he was making a suggestion. He was very concerned for my safety.

One day he caught me playing in the ditch. He went straight to an Alfa bush (I think that's what they're called) and picked a switch. He stripped all the leaves off and proceeded to switch me all the way back to the entrance of the store. I was screaming, hurting and left with welts on my legs.

Now I know that spanking, in any form, today is a no no. However, it immediately established who the boss was and from that moment on I never, and I do mean NEVER, crossed that man again. The one thing that I never wanted to do was incur his wrath.

I can go one step further. I never wanted to hear him say "I'm disappointed in you." Those very words would bring me to tears and, trust me, I don't cry.

I plan to write more about him in upcoming weeks, but suffice it to say, I am totally a Daddy's Girl. When he died at the young age of 61, I was able to look into his casket with no regrets. I felt that I had been the best daughter that I could possibly be. I'm not aware of doing anything to make him worry. I spent a lot of time telling him how important he was to me. I listened to his wisdom and advice. I was with him when he left this earth and that's exactly where I wanted to be.

If you are lucky enough to still have your Daddy, do you show him how important he is to you and can you say you'll have no regrets? Do you show him the respect and love that he deserves? Do you tell him often? Do you share important occasions and moments with him and only him?

I know I wish I could still do that! I still miss him and it's been 32 years. If I sit still and listen, I can hear his voice.

What now?

Last Friday I received my second surgical opinion. Both doctors, both considered leaders in their field of neurosurgery in this particular area, independently of each other, feel that I have radiation damage and that surgery would not make things better. In fact, it could make things worse. The balance problem is here to stay.

I've had many hours to mull over possible things that I might do and being the kind of person that I am, I certainly will not take this lying down. I feel I have much left to do.

The doctor suggested that I treat all the other symptoms that I have and watch the tumor to see if it grows. Then, and only then, will I have surgery.

Here is my plan to attack:

1. Counseling. I've used counselors a time or two in my life at various stressful times and now is certainly stressful. I would like help learning to cope with cronic pain.

2. A nutritionist. I have very profound digestion issues that I have previously dealt with, but as stress builds, it escalates. So, I would like a nutritionist to work with me on getting my diet right.

3. Exercise. I am a couch potato. I have always been and have never cared to participate in any kind of physical activity. But, for two days in a row, I have clocked a mile on the treadmill at a pretty fast pace. I have John acting as Jillian (The Biggest Loser) standing in front of the treadmill shouting at me that if I stop, he'll take a bar bell and beat me with it. (You have to watch The Biggest Loser to understand that.)

4. Theraputic deep tissue massage. I have done this for quite a while now when I can afford it. It is expensive, but oh so worth it. I'm going to try to continue because it really works for me.

5. Drugs. Yes, drugs. I was taught not to take any unnecessary medicine and now, it's necessary. I know deep down inside that I need to be on an anti-depressant. Anytime anyone deals with something constantly, they need help. So, I'm officially giving in (please forgive me, Mother - she would not approve.)

6. Take one day at a time. Minute by minute if necessary. Try to keep those things "on my plate" small and manageable. As much as I'd like to do for others and have a busy social life, it's just not in the cards. When I can, I will. When I can't, I will not stress!

7. Continue to stay plugged into the anausa.org group of helpful people that are all going through similar things, some much worse. But, accept their help, guidance, wisdom, and friendship.

8. Remember everyday how much I have to be greatful for. Things could be so much worse and I never lose sight of that.

9. Try to attend my church meetings and get my spiritual "fix" every Sunday. It always leaves me feeling uplifted and happy.

10. Take more time to have fun. Sometimes, when things are just not going right, I thing we forget to just have fun.

11. Continue to travel whenever we can!!!

12. I will make a concentrated effort to reach out, if only by phone, to those around me that are having problems. Speaking from experience, you have no idea how important a phone call can be when you're feeling low. There are friends, co-workers, fellow church members, and neighbors that are in need of a listening ear. I will try to be there for those that I know are suffering.

That's my Dozen!!! I wrote a dozen because my very favorite thing comes in dozens - doughnuts!!!